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Disguise
 a young child laughing    at me   because my hair is blonde and   my eyes are blue     eyes wide shut remembering the history   photos of my grandparents    more Great’s than i could count   at the time   hung on the wall just out of the kitchen   where meals of barbecued carne   were served   in and out of the sliding door    came little wet feet from the pool, through the kitchen   running past the pictures on the wall   near the couch   where my dad sits to braid my hair   like my grandmothers taught him     they learned from their tribe   women and men   tranquil and tender   willful and caring   they loved everyone     even the people who tore down their civilization   and   a young child laughing   kept laughing   at me     here stands my culture   with blond hair and  blue eyes    
Wanting More
 They say the first step to fixing your problem is admitting you have one. Unfortunately, I am not quite there yet. My name is Jessy Anderson and I did everything I could to stay sane.     My life is... Crazy. I get good grades, I have a job, I just got accepted all of the best colleges. I fulfilled all my parents ridiculous expectations. But no matter what I do it never seems to be enough. My Mother tells me Im too fat, Im an embarrassment, a disappointment, Im a whore, Im ugly. She even told me she wanted me to die... It never ends. My Father tells me Im a disappointment and Im dumb just like my mother. He asks me why I always make such bad decisions. I just sit there and take their abuse. My friends are the only ones that know what their abuse does to me. I have an eating disorder to please my mom and my insecurities. I do a number of drugs and drink quite a bit of alcohol to take the pain away. Most of the time it works. My "condition" grows worse and worse every day and ...

 
HI Mackenzie! Love seeing new poetry on your blog! You should submit to the Moorpark review. :)
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